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Posted by Terry Howard @ 8/16/2006  
 So I'm driving down I-4 heading home today and I came across this moron. I wish I had a better picture, this is my cell phone at 70mph (I know, not safe, but I had to get the shot). This "person" had mounted a big fake stabilizer tail fin with a mock jet engine looking tube thingie in the center. It might look cool, on the bat mobile, but this was a late 90's Pontiac or something. It wasn't even black or red, just your standard stock siilvery blue. And driving up it didn't look like some teen kid being funny (like the guy this morning I saw in the van with the WWII Tiger Shark teeth painted on and bull horns mounted on the hood, awesome dude!) it was your typical suburban pimp yo ride wannabe MTV thugster with the dipshit lean and crooked hat. I mean, I thought the guys with the erector set looking whale tail things rising up a whole foot were retarded, but this guy is the king of "Auto-Tards". In fact, I declare a new class of human being, the Auto-Tard, and you sir, are their witless leader. It's obvious you sunk the last of your hard earned minimum wage dollars into that mock Mig-Rig because you certainly couldn't afford to "pimp" out anything else on your car. For that kind of blind stupid commitment to livin' la vida moron, I crown you king, oh lord of the rolling borfs.
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So I'm driving down I-4 heading home today and I came across this moron. I wish I had a better picture, this is my cell phone at 70mph (I know, not safe, but I had to get the shot). This "person" had mounted a big fake stabilizer tail fin with a mock jet engine looking tube thingie in the center. It might look cool, on the bat mobile, but this was a late 90's Pontiac or something. It wasn't even black or red, just your standard stock siilvery blue. And driving up it didn't look like some teen kid being funny (like the guy this morning I saw in the van with the WWII Tiger Shark teeth painted on and bull horns mounted on the hood, awesome dude!) it was your typical suburban pimp yo ride wannabe MTV thugster with the dipshit lean and crooked hat. I mean, I thought the guys with the erector set looking whale tail things rising up a whole foot were retarded, but this guy is the king of "Auto-Tards". In fact, I declare a new class of human being, the Auto-Tard, and you sir, are their witless leader. It's obvious you sunk the last of your hard earned minimum wage dollars into that mock Mig-Rig because you certainly couldn't afford to "pimp" out anything else on your car. For that kind of blind stupid commitment to livin' la vida moron, I crown you king, oh lord of the rolling borfs.